Why is it that parents or the oldies have to lie their way just to satisfy a child’s curiosity ? Why can’t they just tell it as it is and give the child the responsibility to understand. Am not saying, that a child should be told scientific or graphic details, but one that is understandable to the level he is capable of absorbing.
Most little minds would ponder on the question “who made me” and the proverbial reply would always be “God made you!”…why can’t they just say that parents have sex and after nine months, out comes a baby. Well I guess, talking about sex in those days was taboo. Even just the words ‘sex’ was rarely mentiond unless some bisdak with a loose tongue would say that it’s the number which comes before seven.
Then also, the tradition of leaving peso coins under the pillows when a molar has been extracted. The real tooth fairies I realized where those gay dentists who pull out your good teeth and charge you exorbitant rates for a porcelain implant.
When we were younger stories we were often told were that of princes saving the princesses and then lived happily ever after….NOT…In reality, they get married which translates to moments of passion, hours of leisure, and days of ceasefire from arguments. The rest is spent in juggling children’s activities, balancing house budgets, cleaning, washing, cooking etc..etc..etc.
How do you know Snow White’s prince didn’t leave her because of the meddling seven dwarfs? Or that Cinderella’s step sisters were successful in achieving their wanton desires over the prince leading them to have affairs? Or that Beauty had botox because every time she looked at the Beast, was a reminder that when you get married, you end up looking alike. Who knows, right?
The truth of the matter is, we only realize that most of what we had read when we were young, were either myths or far from reality. And adding to our curious and rambunctious state, how many times were we told to behave or else…
….the police will lock us up in jail
….or that your daddy will give you a whacking when he gets home.
….the moomoo would come and get us
Fear is a very powerful tool in instilling discipline in a child. That is why our parents often would concoct stories of monsters, evil persons and beings, who will be responsible for stealing the comfort or happiness in our lives. But fear is not the absence of courage, it is the absence of knowledge. It is because we did not know any better.
As we grow older, the truth will often reveal itself and the myths that once held our belief would be discarded. Being creative in disciplining children to be good persons, is the ultimate goal of every parent. Therefore, we often adhere to what our own parents had taught us because, hey..we came out to be fine, didn’t we? If not, how else would we train if not from our very own experiences.
But like it or not, what may hold true in their time may not be relevant in ours. It is time for us parents, to face our children with utmost honesty but with the creativeness of handling situations depending upon the level of maturity.
Take this holiday season, where Santa is the flavor of the week. Mike told my grandchild that Santa does not exist and that the real Santa was just daddy and mommy giving them presents. Elise, my grandchild, started getting teary eyed. She did not want what Mike had said. And she blurted, “no, lolo, mommy and daddy has no white hair and don’t have beard, so they can’t be santa!”
Oftentimes, we believe what we believe because it brings comfort to our understanding . It gives us assurance that what we know is indeed the truth and veering away from it would lead us to an unknown territory needing to be explored anew. For a little child, Santa represents judgement of being good during the year and rewards of gifts are inevitable. Whoever invented him is brilliant because he has created a multi billion industry that brings the economy into a rock and roll mode.
And speaking of Santa, weren’t we told that he would go back to the North Pole and start preparing for next year’s Christmas? Well, that’s a LIE. Santa lives in New York, drives an SUV (and not reindeers anymore. He goes with the times, you know) His red suit is an ARMANI and he doesn’t hire elves , but has an assistant just like his size. He probably realized that he’d get in jail for hiring child labor. You don’t believe me…I have proof…probably joining in the ‘After Christmas’ mega sales since it’s easier to buy the ‘made in china’ stuff than making their own. Here it is:
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