Should a mistake be forgiven as easily as it is made? This has been a very rhetoric question that probably needs a lot of explanation to tackle. (I am begininng to sound like a counselor)
A friend of mine once asked my opinion whether she should forgive her husband who had a one night affair which was not intended to happen, but it just did. Many scenarios of businessmen going on trips without wives have led to compromising situations of being at the right time, in the right place with the ‘right’ person ending up in illicit passions.
My friend had full trust on her husband but the revelation of this one night affair devastated her to pieces and so what was I to say?
My take on this is that “Forgiveness is not an option, it is a requirement. But to be able to go back to the same ‘beautiful relationship’ as what my friend insinuated they had, is a total misconception. The stigma of a betrayal is harder to bear for the offended party especially when there was never any cause to create it.
And for the husband to say there was no intention in the first place but because he was at the right time, in the right place at the right moment was just too intolerable to resist. This may be true for the moment, but to say it was with the ‘right person’ is questionable to my mind when one is in a beautiful relationship.
And to be with all of those requirements above as regarding to time, moment and place could be a perfect description for a blissful encounter. So, if indeed you have been in a beautiful relationship all these years, it should have been with the ‘right person’.....and unless this has been replaced by some other one even ‘for the moment’, then that ‘beautiful relationship’ has had it’s toll . For if indeed, you were with the right person, then everything would be all fine, after the ecstasy and fulfillment shall have played its course instead of guilt and shame.
We can never make mistakes, we can only suffer the consequences of our actions. Because if it was a mistake, why make it in the first place and say it was never intentional. Oh how we love to play with fire and end up scorched to pieces just to taste the moment of orgasmic pleasure.
Time will heal all wounds and it always does. But between the moment of decision to forgive, until the moment of total healing will really depend on the person. Whether she will hold on to that mistake and place it on her husband as a sign of his infidelity, it is also up to the husband to win back that trust he so ruined.
So who is now the weaker sex? the offended party who cannot easily forgive and must carry it for a time, or the guilty offender, who needed a moment of passion? Should a relationship be ruined for a single mistake?
As for me, I wouldn’t know because I am not there, and pray that I never will be!!!!
