Child philogagging

Logic, Wisdom, Knowledge?...These are disciplines which baffles me everytime I encounter an experience that requires my utmost ability to make use of any. Wanna be a philosopher? Talk to a four year old and he will bring you to an infinite regression where every question requires an answer and the ultimate answer will lead you to a Creator.

A child's first encounter with the world and how he communicates is by instinct. When he's hungry, wet, or irritable he cries. This is the signal that a child needs attention. As he grows older, sign languages become predominant which will eventually lead to single words. A child starts gaining knowledge by identifying certain objects and actions. Simple words like 'eat', 'milk' and 'booboo' enter his vocabulary as something physical. Later on, association with intangibles called emotions such as being 'mad', 'happy', angry integrate with a host of more complexities.

Then as a child grows to the age of accountability, he realizes that the effects do have causes, and therefore the need for more knowledge and logic permeates the innocent mind. So the proverbial "Why?" is often associated with this age.
Two ways of handling situations always come to mind. The "what I know best" Way or the "Filipino Way"

"WHAT I KNOW BEST WAY!"

mom: Dong, time to eat na.
kid: Mommy, why do I have to eat? I just want to play, mommy.
mom: we all have to eat, so we can have energy go play
kid: why, mommy?
mom: food makes our body move.
kid: why ?
mom: just like a car needs gasoline to run, we need food.
kid: why?
mom: when you play, don't you sweat?
kid: yes
mom: and when you feel like, don't you go potty.
kid: yes
mom: well, its the food in your body that makes you do all these things
when you play, the food gives you the energy to run fast, and then
the food comes out in the form of your sweat.And when you go potty
the food again comes out in another form. So if you have no
food anymore inside of you, you'll be too weak to run and play.
kid: why?
mom: well, thats how our body works.
kid: why?
mom: because we were made that way.
kid: why?
mom: God made us that way?
kid: why?
mom: your food is getting cold. I'll answer you when you finish your food
kid: okay mommy!

or you can answer "THE FILIPINO WAY"

mom: Dong, time to eat na.
kid: 'Nay, why do we have to eat?
mom: stop asking too many questions, now EAT!
kid: Pero nay, I still want to play.
mom: Sigue, if you don't eat, the Lord will get angry.

(end of story)

Sounds familiar? I guess as Filipinos, we are responsible in raising our kids the right way. When we refer a Creator as the ultimate cause, then we have established his Being. Let me give you my own factual experience in explaining to an American four year old, when he asked me regarding my race.

William: Tita, why is your color brown and I am white.
me: Well, its because we are made differently. I have more melanin cells
in my body while you have less (buti na lang I read a lot)
William: why?
me: Well, that's because in my country, we have summer all year long.
Which means I need to have more protection from the sun.
William: why? what you mean?
me: remember,when we go swimming,we need to put on sunblock so we wont
burn? right?!
William: yes?!
me: well the melanin cells are sort of a sunblock that we have inside us.
You have less melanin cells because you are less exposed to the sun.
Isn't it that during the winter and the fall we stay mostly indoors
therefore we're not being hit by the sun often, right?
William: Yyyeeaahh?!
me thats how melanin cells were made and work.More exposure to the sun, more
melanin cells needed to protect our body.
William: oh that's why?
me: And if you see darker people then that's becaue their grandmother's
grandmother's grandmother used to live in places where the sun
always hit their skin and so melanin cells were more.
William: Oh! OOOookkkaaayyyy......(end of discussion)

now let me tell you how a filipino would answer:

toto : 'nay! why are some people white and some people black?
nanay : kasi, To, kasalanan ni Lord.
toto : bakit, nay.
nanay : long time ago, the Lord decided to make people. Tapos,sa heaven
He had a huge oven. He cooked the people inside the oven.Yung mga
americano, kulang ang pagkaluto kaya medyo puti. Yung
mga negro, nakalimutan niya sa oven tapos kaya nasunog, nangitim sila.
Eh tayo, mahal tayo ng Lord, so tamang tama lang pagkaluto...( what a story! eh, what about the albinos, did God's oven not work?)


Fear, as someone said, is not the absence of courage but the absence of knowledge. Our elders of yesteryears tried to concoct stories and folklores just to satisfy a questioning mind, thereby sometimes opening up traditional superstition whose purpose is self serving. (sorry, but i could exemplify more in bisaya)

'nay, ngano dili pwede abrihon ang payong sa balay?
'kay malas man gud!
'ngano man 'nay?
kay kung abrihon gud, unya naay swerte sa balay, mura man imong gisalikway..
ah, bitaw noh?

this is an aged old superstition which i think has no basis. I could only conclude that years ago, someone came inside the house with a wet umbrella. To easily dry it off, the umbrell needed to be opened. But since the house was probably small
and occupied the whole house, a wet umbrella would cause more mess (thus the malas). Or an open umbrella drives the malas away like it drives the rain away. Being inside a house on a wet day is a blessing, therefore having it opened, drives away the blessing inside the house. (is that logical for a child? guess so.) And poor kid carries that tradition from generation onwards until someone is smart enough to refute it. (probably an aetheist in the family)

Making up stories to satiate an innocent mind leads to a question of credibility. Along the way, a child will know if you are fibbing or not because he will eventually realize fact from fiction. William Occam, a Franciscan friar and logician says that finding the simplest solution to an answer is the best way of understanding rather than presenting its complexities. Thus, we often find ourselves in story telling scenarios with our children and get amaze with our own creative minds. But how can we keep things simple and still be believeable.

A five year old once asked his father,"Dad, where's mom?"
Dad says," Mommy is at a Tupperware party."
The explanation satisfied the boy for a moment but then he asked his dad,
"what's a tupperware party dad?"
Figuring out the simplest and best explanation he said, "well son, a Tupperware party is a bunch of ladies sitting around and selling plastics to each other."
The boy burst out laughing, "Oh come on dad! what is it really?"

Well, from that incident, a Tupperware party IS indeed a bunch of ladies selling plastic to each other. But I guess Tupperward International sees it as more complex that we'd like to think of.

Books have become an influence in our lives and the only ones we were exposed to were imported, thus becoming part of who we are. We tried to become
like "them" instead of being just us.

As I write this piece, I am compelled to share my burden for the little minds that are being influened by foreign values. Rather than instilling our very own heritage, our christmasses are snowmen, eggnogs and a fat,guy in red suit called Santa bringing gifts; That fall and spring are seasons instead of actions or that toilet paper is so "in" while a tabo of water is so "out". Where Mother's Day, Father's Day and Valentine's Day is part of the Filipino holidays.

The notion of children being seen and not heard is still practiced in many a Filipino homes. I once asked my aunt if that held true for us while growing up because at some point we did keep quiet. It was much clearer when my aunt said that we were allowed to speak our minds, but we were not allowed to question the elders.

Moreover, growing up, emotions were suppressed and an outburst would be considered disrespect or a sign of immaturity. No wonder controlled and negative feelings manifested itself in many forms such as corruption, greed and vengeance. And you wonder why our government is what it is today?

If I were to 'make a difference', I would make books taking away all the foreign themes and instead of Mr. Scrooge, I would probably make "Mr. Mah Lung Kot", a chinese who thinks of nothing but business and hording rice. Or about emotions expressing itself without being disrespectful. Or about what to do when you think something is not right. The subjects are unlimited and filipno stories are endless.

Let's "nip the bud", while we can. As the bible says, "train the child,in the way he should go, and when he does,he will not depart from it. When this is done, it is easier to prime the vine.

I wake up to the sound of pitter patter come inside the room. My 2 year old grandchild, Andrea walks in, with a pacifier in her mouth. She sees a hunk under the comforter blanket thinking it is her mom. Andrea slides under the covers and stays beside me. Three minutes later, she slowly scoots her way to the edge of the bed, stands up and then runs back to her room, where her sister and dad are sleeping. I guess our noiseless communication says it all.

I have been baby sitting my grandchildren for 2 days now while my son and his wife are busy working. They have different schedules every week. My son works afternoon shift at a music store, while my daughter in law is a nurse and takes the evening shift. Somewhere in between, leaves my grandchildren without a caretaker so my husband and I fill in, when the need arises. Such is the life in America. That is why Mike and I would say that our mission here is 'apostolic'-- meaning bantay mga apo..

Today, Wednesday, both my son and his wife have their day off. This would give me a chance to go home to my own abode and do necessary chores. It is still 6 in the morning, too early to do anything much. After that intrusion from my granddaughter, I am wide awake. I go to the kitchen, make myself a cup of coffee and head to the computer to check on my latest e-mails. I turn on the t.v. for the news and weather report.

Just then, an idea struck me. Why not go to New York and see for yourself what NBC looks like when they do the TODAY show? As thoughts escalated through my mind, I catch myself getting excited every minute. The next thing I knew, I was dressed in my jeans and a denim blazer with my black Prada backpurse at my back. I told my son the previous night that I would go home today, but I didn't expect I would leave this early.

I caught the 7 o'clock Manhattan bound bus and about 20 minutes later, I was in Rockefeller Center. On a whole block side area between two buildings, a cordon was made and about 5 different stage sets were placed. A special walkway for viewers of the show and another for passers-by were made to instill traffic flow of people. I caught myself go in through the viewers path, where a man at the entrance asked to check my backpack for security purposes.

Inside the cordoned area, cameramen, crew, staff were busily moving about. Wires were like snakes winding their ways around sets. Lights were glaringly focused on sets. There were already viewers stationing themselves on the rails. The first set had a rectangular table with what looked like half cooked barbequed ribs, a chopping board and some sauces while on the side was a portable grill, smoke coming out from its sides. Walking further, I am standing behind a backdrop where I see two bar stools and with flowering plants accentuating the whole stage scene. A few yards was another set with what looked like a booth with a bar. Sand was its floor base and on the bar were bottles of sunblocks and lotions. A few yards from the bar was a step up of another beach like stage. A little farther had a different setting. This time it looked like a wedding scene where flowerlike spring ambience was in the air. Two wedding cakes were on different tables facing each other and behind it was a floral backdrop. And finally another table, much like similar to the previous stage was a rectangular table covered in cloth and on it were colored cupcakes in tiered plastic containers.

In between the last two stage sets was a small path that led to a door of the NBC headquarters. This was where Matt Lauer, Meredith Viera and the rest would buzzle from the indoor set to the outdoor. I then called up Mike from his slumber and told him to turn on to channel 4, just in case...

I was able to be on the second row of people already queing up behind the last stage set. The weather was cooperating although showers were predicted that day. The moment, the stars of Good Morning America walked through the door, fans started screaming. I didn't know what reaction to make but I could have sworn I had a stiff jaw from smiling ear to ear. The lady in front of me had a daughter who was dressed in blue graduation gear complete with a cap and hood. Meredith Viera went to her and congratulated her,and I was in full view. Behind Ms. Viera's wrinkles, lay a beautiful woman both inside and out. I am so impressed with her demeanor and her star personallity. She is the epitome of "the anchor woman" with such humor and wit. Matt Lauer didn't seem as friendly, but he did make an effort. The segment of the stage set where I was located was that of the amazing race-couples edition. The cupcakes that were on the table were for the couples to sell or give away and then to ask for donations for something. I dished out a dollar and got my chocolate cupcake with a domino shaped icing on top. When the segment was over, some people decided to move.

AT this point, I also started to move toward the exit area only to be slowed down by the throng of people blocking the first stage set. Apparently, that part of the show belonged to Martha Stewart. True enough, as I was about to leave, Martha and Meredit started to move towards the set and in a few minutes started their dialogues about barbeque and grilling. Sensing myself through the crowd, I was able to go right behind the Today banners. From that vantage point, I was still able to see Martha Stewart, within a few yards from me.

Since I was getting tired of stretching my neck and having a stiff jaw from smiling, I decided to call it a day and proceeded to the nearest exit. Walking to Penn Station, where a train would take me back to New Jersey, I was surprise at what I just did...Going to a t.v. station to look for stars. What else, di ba? Thank God it was only Mike who saw!